I am not perfect. (Surprise!! hahaha)
No, but seriously, I love my children more than life itself, but I feel like I have done them a disservice for the past few years. I have been sluggish. I have been LAZY. I have not been the mom I have wanted to be. Don't get me wrong. I love on them and encourage them at every turn. I take care of their needs. I am a good mom. My problem has been that I have not been active enough with them.
I have had the blessing of having summers off because of the fact that I work in education. I have the absolute pleasure of spending hours of quality time with my children during the most fun season of the year,and I feel like I have wasted it. I have spent too many of those hours spectating from the couch. It is sad. It was my reality. I don't want that to be the reality anymore.
I want to create memories for my children that they can look back on as adolescents and adults with smiles on their faces. I want them to remember things that we did...TOGETHER. I want them to remember places we went. I want them to remember more than what I have given them so far. I am sitting here typing this right and I am disgusted with myself. I am going to snap out of it though, because this feeling will get me nowhere unless I do something with it.
Therefore, I have made a commitment to make this summer different. I know there is a lot of summer to go, but I am already doing better. We have spent more time outside than in. I have plans for the week for little field trips. We are equipped with zoo memberships, beautiful parks, a library program calendar, craft supplies, a sand box, a fun sprinkler, and the list goes on. I also think this will keep me on track for my personal health goals because I am keeping busy. Food is not on my mind at all and I love it.
This journey for me has become way more seeing a lower number on a scale. It has become about improving myself as a whole. It has been about admitting where I can do better in my life and putting a plan into action to make that improvement. I am sick of my life passing me by as I look back and think of all of the things I should have done. I am finished wasting time.
Did some shopping today. I bought a sprinkler and craft supplies (including water colors). Somehow I forgot bubbles (d'oh!). I found these cute little tote bags at Michaels. I bought fabric markers and I am going to have the kids decorate their own bag. Then I am going to have them pack their choice of snacks and things when we go on our picnics, to the water park, etc. I even found reusable drink bottles that match each of their bags. They were excited about that!
Painting with watercolors out on the deck. I made a special picture. :) Darcy hasn't quite gotten the concept of dipping your brush in water before switching colors, but oh well! (I know it seems as though I take a lot more pictures of Darcy, but she is more willing to allow me to take her picture than Aidan.)
Playing in the sprinklers. They stopped to pose for me. They are so stinkin' cute!
My toes in the sand. Too bad it is in a Little Tikes sandbox and not on a beach somewhere. I will take what I can get though!
Proof that we had a fun day. Little girlie barely ever takes naps anymore. She crawled up into my lap and passed out. Be still my heart...
Don't be too hard on yourself. I think we all feel guilty at times that we re not active enough with our kids. I always worry that I'm missing valuable time with my girls working or too tired from everything for mommy fun. I'm fortunate too though cause I m in education and get the summers off with them. If you haven't visited Time with A & N drop in.I follow you through GFC.
ReplyDeleteI will try not to be. I have just decided that I have this wonderful opportunity to be home with them for weeks at a time, and I want to make the most of it. That doesn't mean I will have a laundry list of activities every single day, but I am at least going to make more of an effort to keep things interesting. :) I am following you, by the way. Great blog!
DeleteI was going to comment almost the same thing :) I also want to say that what kids remember about a summer being fun can be very different than an adults. My mom stayed home with me when I was little, but honestly I don't remember much of it. The activities weren't something that instilled great memories, but the feeling that my mother was there for me every summer do. Kids just want to feel loved and appreciated.
ReplyDeleteI agree. I guess the point that I was trying to make is that I want to make more of an effort to engage with them in more meaningful ways. I don't have to be their entertainment,but I want them to get more from me tham what they have been getting. :)
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